I’ve been struggling with my eating disorder lately, I did so well for 3 months then the past week things kind of fell apart. I started buying tons of junk food. I’m not very good at doing anything in moderation, I tend towards the extreme of not eating nearly enough to the opposite of bingeing. I kept things pretty balanced for awhile and I guess I convinced myself that I would never have another problem with this again so I ended up impulsively buying a lot of junk food trying to reason that I’d “have it around the house for a treat once in awhile” and well, I ended up bingeing for several days and purging. I feel disappointed with myself and disgusted but I’m trying to not let this equate to “failure” in my mind. It’s a setback that I can learn from and move on. Obviously I learned having large quantities of junk food in my house is not an option, I don’t know how to control myself and it’s just a disaster waiting to happen. There’s nothing wrong with having treats once in awhile but I realize I don’t have that kind of self control yet, maybe someday but I think it’s too early in recovery right now for that. I’m just going to move forward from this and keep working on my recovery.
Thanks for reading!